I Had a "Moment"

Last night I had a "moment".  I was just so sad............  The whole world is broken ,  I'm broken, you are broken, and those you know are broken.  This globe that we live on has been abused and taken for granted - unappreciated.

In my corner of the world, I see things that just make me despondent.  They are little things to be sure, but much loved, and missed when they are gone.  For instance, the stars..........  We live outside of our small city, and it's rather like country - or at least parts of it.  We used to be able to see the stars so much brighter than they are now.  When I slip out onto the back patio, after dark, where once the tree frogs and other night creatures. sang out, there is silence.  The still quiet of the night that comes from small populations, and the absence of convenience stores is even disappearing.  More and more I hear the rumble of loud engines as cars go by, in place of the lowing of the cow for her calf, or the packs of coyotes that run free.

My daughter is a bee keeper.  I've learned that bees are very docile workers who do really amazing things:  they dance in the hive when they find a good food source and they want to tell the others; they produce and share with us that wonderful food - honey.  They pollinate our flowers and vegetable gardens and without them we could grow no food.  But for some reason, bees are disappearing..... (http://www.motherearthnews.com/homesteading-and-livestock/the-importance-of-beekeeping-zbcz1402.aspx

A person with a disability will look at things differently  than someone who is strong and healthy.  We may be afraid to try new things, or stop doing old familiar things because we cannot depend on our bodies to respond to things in the needed way.

But I will move on from this sad moment.  I don't want to get stuck.  I can do little to change the world, but I can  decide how to live in my little corner..........  and you can too!

The Day is Late

Today, I added many serious requests for prayer to our church's prayer list.  They are coming in faster and there are more of them, and they are of a more serious nature than even just a few years ago.     I am aghast at the suffering so many are going through.  If you have P.D, then I can say with assurance that you have suffered.  And guess what?  And after being born again, this qualifies you to be a servant in God's kingdom.  Your experiences are different than someone else's, but the pain is the same.

You have paid a high price in order to be able to minister to others who are in pain.  It's not what I set out to learn, but it's what I have learned.

We think of pain as bad and unproductive, but it doesn't have to be.  The good kind brings about good  changes.  I know that a major part of my ministry is praying for people, and with people.  I have had to learn that prayer doesn't always get you something, but get's you through something.  Never underestimate the power of a single prayer.

It's time to start praying seriously for one another.  While there is opportunity and while we can do this, we must do this!  Ask God to show you how to pray; ask Him what exactly He wants you to pray; ask Him to give you His mind and His heart; ask for His perfect results; and ask that He would change you through prayer.

It's not the prayer so much that matters (though that is important), but more important is WHO you are praying TO.  If you are praying in any other name than Jesus Christ, God's only Son, who  died for us and paid the penalty for our sins, then your prayers are worthless.

Some have spent their lives wasted on their own pleasures, with no goal, and have rejected God.  If that is you, then I pray God may open your eyes before it is too late and that you will repent.  There is coming a day when those who do not belong to Him will finally get their way.  They will forever be separated from God who has loved them so much.  There will be a final line of crossing over, and then the dye is cast; there will be no 2nd chance as we still have today.  It will be too late to change our minds.

If this is where you are headed, I hope that you have someone who is praying for you............

God's Compassion for You

I have been fretting and hurting over some things.  All night I had disturbing dreams.  I am up early and just now, as I sat at the breakfast table having my first cup of coffee and doing devotions, I heard a cow's mournful bellowing in the pre dawn as it echoed back and forth across the space behind our house.  It was distressing and inspired my prayers for its relief.

Surely when our cries of distress rise up to God - He pauses to listen - He hears - and His compassion is forthcoming.  We can rest assured that His compassion is more easily provoked than our own.

The troubles stealing my peace are hidden under the very shallow surface of self-composure - and do tirelessly seeth and boil tearing away old landmarks of complacency like a steady flow of freshly spewn lava, all the while depositing new terrain.

The cow is still bellowing unheard by its lazy owner.  She is left alone to deal with her misfortune.  I am left to wonder what has befallen her. 

I hear an answering sound - a cry very much like the first, yet further away and in response.  Proof of compassion IN a creature FOR a creature... like its Creator - built to respond.

When distressed, we cry out.  That cry invokes the response of the Creator and oftimes comes through a fellow sojourner.  It is no less proof of His care and concern because it comes through an unexpected channel.

L. B. Cowman (Streams in the Desert) says it like this:  "Onto the pages of every trial there are narrow shafts of light that shine.  Thorns will not prick you until you lean against them, and no one will touch you without God knowing.  The words that hurt you, the letter that caused you pain, the cruelty of your closest friend, your financial need - they are all known to Him.  He sympathizes as no one else can, and watches to see if through it all, you will dare to trust Him completely."

A New Storm Forecast

Another storm is coming, and some of us are not recovered from the last one.  It's true that this storm is not supposed to be anything like Sandy, but I know many people who still don't have power.  Some are cooking on gas stoves, if they are lucky.  Some are washing clothes and taking showers at a neighbor's house if possible.  Many are still without refrigeration for their food.  The temperatures are very cold and the gas lines are still endless.  And of course there are some who no longer have a home or may have even lost a loved one.

Sometimes in life we endure one storm after another.  Before we have dealt with the aftermath of one, another comes along.  Sometimes we even have several storms converging at once.

Yesterday, I felt like this.  I actually felt on the verge of collapse.  I went to my doctor, and he examined me and told me that my body is particularly stressed, and he added some supplements to my diet.  He talked to me a little bit about the uncertainties in life, and that there are many things we just can't see coming.  His words of advice to me in dealing with all of this?  "The righteous shall live by faith."  In other words, it's not the future we need to know, but He Who holds the future in His hands.  We need to know our God.  It's Him that we entrust our lives to.  He will deliver us as He sees fit.

Do you have a disease?  You are already one step ahead of the strong and the healthy.  They will try and deal with it all in their own strength, while in contrast you have come face to face with your own powerlessness.  That is the first step of faith - trusting God to do what you cannot - AND trusting Him to know what should or should not be provided.  He allows troubles to come our way so we learn that HE is our everything.  He is the answer.

Quit fighting dependence on Him.  Rest.  Enter into His rest.

What Should I Do?

How much should I trust the medical community?  How far should I go in allowing procedures, taking recommended drugs and adopting exercises?  Well, this is something I cannot decide for you.  What is good for me, may not be the thing for you.  What I CAN say with certainty is that you must totally rely on your heavenly Father to guide and direct you.  Pray.  If you are not hearing Him, then ask Him to help you to hear.  Prayer is like anything else.........  If we rarely exercise our prayer "muscles" then they will be weak.  We won't have such good hearing when it comes to Him speaking to us.  This does not happen over-night.  The Bible tells us to pray without ceasing.  It's like breathing.  We are not constantly sending up structured prayers for specific things, but rather it's like walking with a friend - we are in-step with one another, we are aware of the other's presence, though our thoughts run unhindered from thing to thing.  When our friend speaks, we hear and vice versa.
Also, God has different work for different ones.  He uses us to spread the gospel in unique ways.  I know that on my journey through this life, I have talked to and shared with certain people that had I not been doing what I was doing, I would not have had that opportunity.  What have seemed like problems in my life have turned out to be exposure to people and places where not only others were blessed by my life, but I was blessed also by their lives!
I would venture to say that it is not just a matter of what is good for us, but a matter of knowing our place within the body of Christ.  We are not here on this earth only to save our lives, but through Him to give life.  This is what the Bible has to say about this:  John 12:24-26   "...unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed.  But if it dies, it produces many seeds.  The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.  Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be.  My Father will honor the one who serves me."
You will be safe if you go where the Lord tells you to go and do what the Lord tells you to do.
You must have a relationship with Him so you can hear Him, you must obey, and you must trust Him.  He is our Shepherd.  He is there to guide us and take care of us.  He will not harm us.  A good shepherd knows each sheep.  The life of the sheep is totally dependent upon the shepherd.  The sheep doesn't know what to do or where to go.  Your Shepherd will lead you to green pastures and beside still waters.  HE will guide you in the paths of righteousness.  /Read Psalm 23 if you need to be reminded.

Somebody Out There Needs a Prayer Tonight

I feel compelled to pray.... Someone out there tonight is desperate for help.  You are being attacked and worn out by spiritual forces of darkness.  Whoever you are, DON'T DESPAIR.  Know that your life is PRECIOUS to Him.  He has heard your prayer and help is on the way. Please read James 1.   I want to pray for all of you who have Parkinson's Disease.  You are on my heart tonight:

Heavenly Father, I sit at Your feet with the needs of my friends who have PD.  We have special needs, therefore we have special requests.  I want to thank you that you are not a God of confusion or chaos, and I praise You that You give us the gift of a sound mind.  Give us clarity, Lord.  Give us Your wisdom.  Keep a watch over our mouths and let only words that edify the Body come out of our mouths.  Teach us tonight, even as we sleep.  We need a special word from you right now.  Save us from our enemy - Satan ....  Hide us from him.  Give us the courage we will need to get through tomorrow.

We thank you with every beat of our hearts for the ways You have used us - in this condition - to change a life, or perform a miracle.  There are many things You have done through us and we don't even know it.  Raise up those of us who are under heavy attack and revive our exhausted hearts, for You alone are the Lord our God.  Our enemy cannot touch us because we are safely tucked under Your wings.

We love belonging to You....

From a Dull Ache to Praise and Prayer

The ache is dull…. The one that goes through all of me….

We've all had days like that. We seem to sometimes get caught up in a fog of pain and despondency. The antidote is prayer which is praise, thanks and communion with our God:

Father, I praise Your name, because You are holy; You are love; You are mighty and courageous; Your power is limitless; and yet………….. You make Yourself small, so I can know You.
Forgive me that I cannot understand all that You are, and all that You have done, and just how deep Your love for me goes. Here I am, Lord……… Please heal me. Turn my heart back to You. You are all that I need. I confess my total dependency upon you. Give me a piece of Your truth right now, that will minister to my need. Restore me…………. Completely.
I wish to stand for You. Use me, Lord. Restore the passion to my heart that is Yours. Please inspire me to do all of Your will.

From Your daughter, Anna.

Anything is Possible!

Anything is possible today! I believe in the spiritual realm things are always happening that we have not even conceived of. Incredible miracles. We are so limited in our sight and our view, we are aware of very little. But God is working and loving all the time. After all, He went to the nth degree when He sent His only Son to save us and redeem us, then to help us to live to the fullest. Do you think He is doing any less today? If we could see everything that God is doing, it would overwhelm us! The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 13:12, "For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I shall know fully just as I also have been fully known."

Here on earth, with our partial knowlege and limited sight, we are distressed and hopeless before we ever get out of bed. But look up and have faith! God cares about what goes on and He cares for our loved ones far more than we do! He cares that we are afflicted, perplexed, forsaken, and struck down (2 Corinthians 4:7-10)! He cares that we are having trouble holding it all together! And He's doing something about it. Believe it. "For we who live are constantly being delivered over to death for Jesus' sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh." (2 Corinthians 4:11)

Ask Him to show you and open up to you some of the secret ways He is moving and working on your behalf today. Ask Him to help you think outside of the box. Tell Him you need help to "see" what He is doing.

You are loved. Don't be fooled into thinking that you are any less than His beloved.

How to Handle Suffering

Job's pain and Unjust Suffering Did Not Prove to be a Barrier to Receiving God's Blessing and Love


Scripture describes Job as blameless and upright – a man who shunned evil and one who was blessed and protected by God.

Suddenly and for no reason Job could discern, everything he had was taken from him – family, money, health, marriage and even friends turned on him.

IN ALL OF THIS JOB DID NOT SIN BY CHARGING GOD WITH WRONGDOING.

He eloquently and powerfully expressed his pain – his questions:

“After this, Job opened his mouth and cursed the day of his birth. He said: 'May the day of my birth perish, and the night it was said, “A boy is born!”
that day – may it turn to darkness; may God above not care about it; may no light shine upon it. May darkness and deep shadow claim it once more; may a cloud settle over it; may blackness overwhelm its light. That night – may thick darkness seize it; may it not be included among the days of the year nor be entered in any of the months. May that night be barren; may no shout of joy be heard in it. May those who curse days curse that day.'” (Job 3:1-8)

“I will not keep silent; I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit; I will complain in the bitterness of my soul.” (Job 7:11)

“If I speak my pain is not relieved and if I refrain, it does not go away.” (Job 16:6)

Job found that his “trusted friends” gave him bad counsel. “Now you too have proved to be of no help.” (Job 6:21)
Job verbally affirms the character of God:
“Though one wished to dispute with him, he could not answer him one time out of a thousand. His wisdom is profound, his power is vast. Who has resisted him and come out unscathed? He moves mountains without their knowing it and overturns them in his anger. He shakes the earth from its place and makes it pillars tremble. He speaks to the sun and it does not shine; he seals off the light of the stars. He alone stretches out the heavens and treads on the waves of the sea. He is the Maker of the Bear and Orion, the Pleiades and the constellations of the south. He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted.” (Job 9:3-10)

Job doesn't stuff his pain or try to deal with it by not confronting it:

“If I say, ' I will forget my complaint, I will change my expression and smile,' I still dread all my suffering.... (Job 9:27)
“He takes his complaint and addresses God” (Job 10:2-12)
Job tried seeking comfort from his friends but the result was:
“miserable comforters are you all!” (Job 16:1)
In spite of earthly sorrows, pain and suffering, Job keeps things in perspective:
“I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him with my own eyes – I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!” (Job 19:25-27)
Finally, Job hears from God. The Lord speaks. Read Job, chapters 38-41.

Job was validated:

“After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, 'I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken of me what is right, as my servant Job has.... My servant Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer and not deal with you according to your folly.
The final result:
Job had an incredible encounter with God. His faith was refined. “The Lord made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before.” (Job 42:10) Though much of what God restored was worldly gain, the most incredible part to me is that there was an exchange between the God of the universe - the Creator - and Job - one man. Job was humbled before God and at the same time elevated and blessed beyond description.

My Thoughts

"...whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence ans anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things." Philippians 4:8

Today focus on the joyful things in your life! It's not irresponsible or putting your head in a hole in the sand to think on such things. This is God's instruction to us! We have a free pass to day dream about wonderful things.

Or.........we could find out the facts of the latest happenings in the news or in the medical community. We could load our minds with statistics and be able to quote the experts. We could be up to snuff with all of the latest predictions and forecasts........

I think I choose whatever is true, honorable, right, pure, etc. That will land me in a place of peace in the absence of anxiety, and a proper picture of God in a world of downsized giants.

The other way of thinking will surely result in a burden too heavy. I will be frustrated at too many facts, not enough answers, and my hope will rest on something other than the goodness of God.

I am not just one little person in a sea of problems without answers. I am a Believer in the God who knows all and is powerful and loving enough to work on my behalf, whether I understand it or not!

I love You, Lord!

Anna

A Lesson on Being Still

"Cease striving and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10 NAS
The NIV says it like this: "Be still and know that I am God."

What God is saying in this verse is: stop exerting, laboring, contending, working, struggling, and endeavoring. Now, while you're not doing those things, meditate and dream on Me. Relect on Me in delightful ways. Flesh out the dreams I put into your heart, and have quiet reverence. Watch to see what I am doing and let your ear be tuned to My voice. I am the Knower and Revealer of secrets. I am the giver of good gifts. Come to me for wisdom, for healing and for comfort. I will fill you with My love which is beyond description. I will fill you like a pitcher so that you may be poured out for others.

Laughter is the best medicine

How long has it been since you have had a good laugh? I mean the kind where the tears come rolling down your cheeks, and you just can't quit. Doesn't that feel great? They say laughter is the best medicine.

I definitely think we take ourselves too seriously at times. After all, the world doesn't revolve around me nor does it revolve around you. And how boring would it be if it did?!

Sometimes if you didn't laugh, you would cry. I much prefer laughing. Why don't you give yourself permission to have a light-hearted day. Watch a funny movie or look at some Gary Larson funnies. Have fun with some practical joking. Most of all, laugh at yourself. People love to be around other people who are happy and fun - people who smile and laugh. And guess what? You can't be laughing and feeling sorry for yourself all at the same time.

His Grace is Sufficient

There's nothing that will bring you to your knees faster than a serious illness, a sudden castastrophy, or some kind of tragedy. Most of us go along living our daily lives, comfortable in our routines, and for the most part undisturbed in our limitations. But then your worst nightmare suddenly becomes reality.

Or maybe you live in a state of wakeful attentiveness to God. You have always sought His will, trying to live by faith in obedience to His commands. Having been a faithful servant, having a real love for God, you are completely thrown off balance when something very scary looms before you. Something that will turn your world upside down.........

Was it like that when you were diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease (or whatever disease you battle, or heartbreak you are forced to endure)? Have you dared to ask God for a miracle? Have you asked Him the scariest question ever - to heal you, but you are still sick?

I read somewhere online (here's the link: http://www.liontracks.org/roarlion/healingnow.htm
"Why would God allow one of His children to remain or become sick? The clear answer of Scriptures is that He will be glorified by it! God uses illness sometimes to correct, to teach, and to give opportunity to other believers for service. Even when we cannot understand the why, it is undoubtedly part of God's plan for the greater good and unquestionably for even my own good. God is working "all things" for our good, even those things that we see as bad or negative."

" If God desires to grant {you} physical restoration immediately and temporarily before death, He can and will, but if He desires that {you} bear this burden for a time, even until death, both are for His honor and glory."

"Some claim a passage in James to guarantee immediate healing, so long as the elders of the church are involved.

James 5:14-16 Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. 16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (NIV)

Those who turn this into a promise for immediate healing have missed a key portion of the text. It is "the Lord (who) will raise him up". This leaves the time and nature of the healing to our Lord and not to the person who is sick or even to the elders. Truly the "prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective" but the nature of all truly God-centered prayer is found in the prayer that Jesus taught:

Matthew 6:10b ... your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. (NIV)"

God is God, and He is love, and we must not lose sight of that. His ways are not our ways. We must have faith that He is who He says He is.

"Faith is resting on the character of God." quote from Malcomb Smith

Fuel for Battle

You know that you have to eat right to fuel your body if you are going to run a race or do an obstacle course. In the same way, you must eat healthy when you're fighting spiritual battles. These battles can be extremely stressful, so be sure to make good choices about the foods you feed your body.

For a couple of months now I've been staying away from sugar and not eating wheat. I can't believe the difference it makes! I have more energy. I just feel so much better. Even my balance is better!

Life today seems like one battle after another. Fuel up for winning. Get creative in taking care of yourself. Ask God to show you and make available to you exactly what you and your family need, and He will.

When Everybody Runs Dry

It's so easy and natural for me to give others encouragement and offer tidbits of wisdom. But when it comes to sizing up a situation and seeing clearly into my own state of affairs, it's much harder. I find it harder to get my balance. That's where I need someone else to help me.

What happens when we don't have that support, and everyone around us feels tired of helping out? It seems as though their limit of compassion has been reached, and those we called "friend" suddenly seem more like anything but a friend. Then i feel unsafe. Where do we go?

It's simple: we go to God. We go to His Word. When there is no one else anywhere, that's where we go. Do you think you would know God half as well if life were easy? It's not until we are hurting that we are ready to listen to Him and draw close.

Psalm 28:6-7 "Blessed be the Lord; because He has heard the voice of my supplication. The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him and I am helped;"

Without Words

I started to write a new entry in my blog the other day......... I was completely stumped. Nothing came. Usually I start writing - not knowing what I will say next - and it just flows out of me. It's rather like turning the water faucet on. Sometimes we don't have words. Sometimes we commune with another by just being there. Sometimes just "being" in the silence is so deep and satisfying.....

I just read this morning that too often we rush into the presence of God with words. We aren't listening or taking in His Presence. We spew out a string of words with singleminded inconsideration.

How are we ever going to get answers from God if all we ever do in His Presence is talk? It is good to remember: "He leads me beside quiet waters." Psalm 23:2

Help Will Come

I've been fretting and not sleeping well over some pretty big problems. Not the kind that you can just brush away. These are definitely outside of my control. My cry to God is, "HELLLLLPPPPPPP!". We all need help. I don't see the answer. So, I have openned my Bible to Psalm 46. Why don't you open your Bible too to this passage. Now, get a colored pencil or a narrow tipped pen and read through it, underlining the verses that comfort you or jump out at you. I wonder if we underlined the same things.............Here's what I marked:



"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." (vs. 1)
"Cease striving and know that I am God" (vs. 10)
"The Lord of hosts is with us" (vs. 11)

Are you troubled? Take your troubles to the Lord, and listen to Him. That's where you're going to find help.

Junk Food or Health Food?

Recently I've been paying attention to what I eat. I've cut out certain things and added others. I'm not taking in less food. In fact, I'm taking in more of the right kinds of food. I've had to change my shopping habits which was an effort, but do you know, I am experiencing more energy, less pain and a more positive outlook! It's making a big difference!

Could we draw a spiritual analogy here? I think that it's safe to say that we should definitely pay attention to what we eat spiritually. I'm sure we'll see that there are certain things we are spiritually taking in that must be cut out. And there are definitly some things that should be added to our spiritual diet. This will require a change of our habits. But if you try it, I'm certain that you'll notice benefits. This feels GOOD.

Our spirits cannot maintain good health on a steady diet of junk foods. We must take in Scripture and digest it (memorize it and meditate on it). And we must cut out the junk foods ( fillers and substitutes). This could be anything that we spend our time doing instead of choosing to be with God. You may not think that you are a junk food junkey, but do this simple test: log the time you spend in Scripture each day this week and on the other side of the paper log the time you spend doing other things (even good things, like cooking and taking care of your home, or carpooling your children). Be honest. You don't have to let anyone see this. Do this every waking hour for a week. You may be shocked by the end of the week.

You may have to make some adjustments in how you spend your time. All of us will one day give an accounting of the time we have been given here on this earth and how we invested it.

Oh, and by the way, eating properly for my body, made it easier to make the spiritual changes that needed to be made. I have a clearer mind when I have more energy and less pain (or no pain).

The Way to Victory

When we are physically compromised, we have to get used to things like not having enough energy, or being clumsy where once we had grace of movement, and other things. PD stresses the body in ways that can cause a worsening of the symptoms that you have.
Life these days is like that. We are under all kinds of stress. We have so many worries, we don't even really remember when it wasn't like that. But don't get discouraged! We are at war.... At war with PD; at war with rulers, powers, and world forces of darkness. We war with spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places (Ephesians 6:12).
We are going to get tired. Let me encourage you, Reader, keep striving to finish the race! We know that God is the Victor and in the end, when all the battles have been fought, and when all of the dust has settled, the Lord's banner will be seen flying high. He wins! And so do we, if we belong to Him.
We will not strive forever!
God has put you here where you are, at this particular time for a reason. Fight for all you're worth! Think of the prize set before you. Jesus is coming back very soon. Having that hope, fight your battles with single-mindedness. Hold back nothing, but spend yourself wherever you are. We will soon rest our weary selves and we will fight no more.

The Real Battle

Someone recently asked me if I have become better able to fend off attacks like depression, self-deprecating thoughts, doubts, anxiety, or fear. I had to say, "Yes, I'm able to stand and resist the attacks of the enemy (the devil) much better now than before". I look back several years and I see the things that used to send me into a tailspin are now not so intimidating.

The reason for this is first of all that I have learned to recognize an attack. The attack is not so much the unknown that suddenly bursts upon me, or the calamity that happens, but it is the lying voice of the enemy that trys to rush in upon me along with the unknown or the calamity. It is that nagging suspicion that I'm not able to stand; that I don't possess the wisdom to get through the trial at hand; it is the echo of voices from my past that chant my unsuitability to overcome difficulties and my inability to make a difference or to have any purpose at all.

It has taken a lifetime of learning to recognize lies. And once I have identified the attack, I must take my stand and resist the lies. It is not me standing alone -fighting giants, but it is me taking my place in the battle line-up while God defeats my formidable foe. Zechariah 4:6 says, "Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the Lord of hosts."

Here is what we need to know when battle is impending: "Thou dost light my lamp; the Lord my God illumines my darkness. For by Thee I can run upon a troop; and by my God I can leap over a wall.... The word of the Lord is tried; He is a shield to all who take refuge in Him. For who is God but the Lord? And who is a rock except our God, the God who girds me with strength, and make my way blameless? He makes my feet like hinds feet, and sets me upon my high places. He trains my hands for battle, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze. Thou hast also given me the shield of Thy salvation, and Thy right hand upholds me; and Thy gentleness makes me great. Thou dost enlarge my steps under me, and my feet have not slipped." (Psalm 18:28-36).

Those of us who have PD KNOW what it's like to have no strength, to shuffle instead of being nimble and quick on our feet, to be so weak in the arms that we cannot lift a fork, to not be able to sit upright with the correct posture, and to fall because our steps are wrong. But O, beloved Reader, see that this is our training ground! We must know our weaknesses in order to experience God's Spirit that strengthens. It is for our good that He puts us through the boot camp of PD! We must practice our resistance to the voice of evil. It is NOT easy, but God is SO gentle and wants to bring us safely home with as many as we can bring.

God loves you,Reader. His way is good. Put your energies into fighting against the real enemy - not against He who loves you.