There is not a word spoken… or a deed done… that does not affect every person around. Well chosen words and acts will hit their intended mark as well as many unintended. Conversely, selfish and thoughtless expressions will injure and wound indiscriminately.
Either way these deeds and words spring from a person’s heart. Mean expressions come from meanness of heart, and kindness is the fruit of a loving heart. We all have parts of both. But there are times when for whatever reason, someone decides to put themselves first (to gratify self) even at the expense of another. One time builds upon another, ‘til it becomes a pattern. To continue in this direction requires lies and denial. To change requires a change of heart and attitude - sorrow.
But damage has been done - to relationships; to reputations, to self-respect (mine and yours)…. Unfortunately, just being sorry (even truly and sincerely sorry) will not repair the damage already done. Trust has been broken. Lies have built walls to keep out more hurt. Pain has bred anger.
Now the question is, “Do I want to repair for my part what I’ve broken?“, or, “Do I care?“. The one will require humility - confession and restitution. The other, nothing.