At the speed of thought I arrive in the past at a precise point of my choosing. Like slipping into a warm pool I ease down into the comfort of a simple memory.
I'm aware of the warmth radiating from the slab of concrete that makes up the sidewalk in front of our house. Barefoot and bare legged, I am comfortably seated. With one eye closed, I try to gage how far Orion's Belt is from my position on the sidewalk. Hugging my knees to my chest, I listen... to the midnight owl that perches in the tree that grows outside my bedroom window. It is behind me. I love the deep throated call of the bull frog hidden in the night. I love the churriping of the crickets. These memories within a memory are so magical. But remembering a moment that is past cannot remove me from this remote present.
Having this disease that still has not relinquished its hold on me, sometimes makes the past more desireable than the present. At first I was fearful of visiting my past because it made me long so intensely for the good things that seemed to be forever gone. But I have come to realize, there is good ahead of me. How do I know this? I know Who will be the Victor of the final battle. It will be the Author of good. He will prevail over the master of death and disease. Evil will be abolished. I will not always be subject to the limitations of this disease. For every affliction, every sadness, every dear memory of a time now unreachable, there will be all that was lost and more, waiting for those who are His. I am relieved and comforted as I meditate on the truth that my disease will not win - it will have no power in the day ahead, and I will remember without the feeling of loss.........
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