I just read an article where the author describes her dashed hopes for the future - now only a dream she once had dreamed - as a still birth or a miscarriage. It occurs to me that this is what life can seem like to those of us who have been diagnosed with a disease, or suffered other tragedy. We all had our plans and hopes of a future that did not include PD (or whatever your own heartbreak may be). Dreams that started with expectant hope and desire for the life that we yearned for, somehow died, and were never allowed to ripen for the day of birth and growth.
I don't know why. I won't tell you that I can make any sense of it. It seems nothing but a tragedy just like death on a cross. And why me? What did I do to deserved this? I am catapulted into a fog of pain, sadness and confusion - perhaps even anger and bitterness, when all I wanted was goodness.
But the one thing I do know in my limited knowledge, I cling tenaciously to. It is recorded in Isaiah 41:10,13.
I am instructed and comforted:
"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you. Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.... For I am the Lord your God, who upholds your right hand."
And I am amazed as I see things that look for all the world like undeserved death on a cross, but eventually usher into my life the most precious parts of life that there are.