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Thursday, March 24, 2011

To Have a Heart After God's Own Heart

Today I am perplexed, frustrated and anxious over some issues I have concerning some relationships I am in. It's nothing new, but the same old problems which keep creeping back. I suppose that's because they are not resolved. I haven't moved on past what's wrong. Oh, believe me, I've tried, but my desire for the truth to come out so healing can begin is not reciprocated. So, like a car stuck in mud, my efforts to resolve these problems more closely resemble spinning wheels that wear themselves out getting nowhere, than the car on firm footing which advances.

I've tried every way to communicate my take on this problem. I've tried talking directly with the person in question. I've tried patiently waiting for that person to be willing to talk with me and seek resolution. I've sufferend through name calling and unjust accusations. I've prayed. I've read Scripture. I've read Christian books. I've shared with someone I thought I could trust to possess the wisdom I need to hear. I've tried stuffing it all. I've even tried yelling back....

So, what do I do now? How do I stop the problem from going on and on? The only choices I have in all of this are about my own actions, words, and thoughts. I cannot control anyone else or make them do good. So, right now.....this morning..... I get down on my knees....
Dear Heavenly Father, my heart is broken and weary. I am constantly battling ungodly thoughts. You know the wrongs that have been done to me. I invite You into this situation and I ask that You help me to be the person You made me to be. I confess to you my tendency to react sinfully when I am attacked. Please bless this dear one so close to me, and yet so hurtful, with Your love and grace. Minister to this one through me. I offer myself up to You through my decision to serve this hurtful person. That's what You did for me. I pray this prayer through Jesus my Savior. Please help me to walk lovingly today, not taking into account a wrong suffered.

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